Partner Survey

We have developed two sites to help people with alcohol and other problems. The first 24/7 Help Yourself is designed to provide the drinker with tools to change. To encourage your partner to change we will give them free membership of 24/7 Help Yourself, the brand new website for people with drinking problems. All they have to do is sign up.

The website is completely free and can leave at any time so there is no risk.

The second of these websites Bottled-up is aimed at helping the partners' of drinkers. We recognise that you are a neglected group who are largely ignored by the treatment industry and want to provide you with help and support. So we have created a brand new program of help and support.

Thank you for your contributions!

"Does she/he really have a drinking problem?" This is an excellent question and one that seems to be important to many of you. So we have tried to provide a discussion about this issue.

"Why does she/he drink like that?" Another good question. For some of you it is important to understand the causes of the behaviour.

"Is the damage to our relationship permanent, or can it be rebuilt?"

And some of the support you are asking for.

"Someone to talk to that has been there" and "Guidance about what to say and do".

These and other issues will be addressed at our new website Bottled-up

Please note that no facilities for partners' of drinkers currently exist at this site. However there are some useful articles on living with someone with an alcohol problem and other topics.

Hi this is Lou and John. We would like to introduce ourselves and tell you about our brand new website.

Bottled-up provides you with a confidential forum to discuss your issues, as well as information and support for you on the lonely road that you are walking. Being the partner of a drinker is often a lonely, shameful and secretive existence. Partners are often torn between loyalty to the drinker and getting support for themselves. They often doubt their sanity and wonder if they are becoming neurotic, paranoid nags. Reality seems to blur as they are totally convinced that their husband/wife/partner has a drinking problem while s/he dismisses the suggestion. Know, because they can smell it, that they have been drinking to be met with “what are you talking about, I’ve not been drinking at all”. You may even believe, or have been persuaded to believe, that it is all your fault.

This is not an easy place to be. If this describes your life at all then you probably crave someone to talk to, someone who understands, someone who you feel safe with, someone who won’t judge you. We want to create a community that will provide this; a place where you can come and share, where you can dump your bad day, listen to others, get some help or help someone else; a place where you can kick your virtual shoes off, let your guard down and just be yourself for a while.

We are happy to tell you that this website is now open at Bottled-up

Who are we?
We are a recently married couple who bring an unusual, if not unique, experience and perspective to this venture.

Lou has decades of first-hand experience of alcohol problems in her family. She has a private practice as a counsellor where she works a lot with victims of abuse and married couples and has a special interest and concern for addiction problems. She is also a classically trained singer songwriter who has released 5 albums of deeply personal music.

John has a PhD in the psychology of addiction. He has been a therapist, designed treatment programmes, carried out research and has published about 50 papers in academic journals and books. He helped design and teach the largest course in alcohol and drugs in the UK. Added to this he has extensive personal experience of his own alcoholism and drug abuse (he has been clean and sober since 1984).