What to do if faced with teen drug use

If you suspect or discover teen drug use by your adolescent the first thing to do, or rather not do, is don’t panic! This is probably the most important piece of advice that I can give, it is so important I’ll repeat it – DON’T PANIC!! Panicking can cause an over-reaction that can make the situation infinitely worse than it needs to be and may make the retrieval of the situation much more difficult, if not downright impossible. The remainder of this page will be written as a FAQ. If you have any questions (or answers) that you would like added to the FAQ please contact me through the the contact page.

Should I make it clear that drug use is not acceptable?
That may the ultimate goal but it should not be your first goal, which should be to try and understand the nature of the situation so it is important to be able to talk about it. By talk I mean a calm discussion, not shouting, haranguing, threatening or lecturing. Any or all of these approaches will only alienate the adolescent. Get a sense of perspective, most teen drug use is fairly trivial, so there is no point in blowing it out of proportion and, if it is serious, then you want to establish lines of communication and trust.

Should I take her/him to see a counsellor?
Again that may be a course of action that is necessary but, unless there are clear signs of physical dependence or psychological problems, it should not be the first course of action. Many people, adults and adolescents, use drugs recreationally without problems indeed research has found that there are some people who use heroin and cocaine recreationally. Not all teen drug use is problematic, or the sign of an underlying psychological problems, or bad parenting or peer pressure.

Kids like to experiment and that can include cigarettes, alcohol and drugs. The number of young adults that reach the legal age for drinking, whether that is 18 or 21 years of age, without having had a cigarette or an alcoholic drink are extremely small. Did you or your siblings or your friends? You may have experimented with drugs yourself or you may know someone who did. In the UK and USA the statistics suggest that around 40% of adults have taken drugs at some time – that is 2 in every 5 people, so it would be surprising if you did not know someone who had taken drugs, even if you were not aware of it. The vast majority experiment and then get on with life without any problems. Some do develop problems and need and benefit from professional help, but this is a very small minority. Involving a counsellor needlessly may only serve to dramatise a problem.

I have seen drug testing kits should I get one and test my teen?
If you are going to work through these issues then there needs to be honesty on both sides. As parents you needs to bring your own issues into the open. These issues may be about fear of the harm that may arise from teen drug use and trusting your adolescent. One way of restoring the trust may be to use drug testing, but only if this is mutually agreed. To impose testing without agreement may undermine any trust you have built.